The four month sleep regression
Holy four month sleep regression!
Has this regression made its way into your home? If so, this post is for you!
Today’s post is all about the infamous four month sleep regression. It’s by far the most dreaded out of all the regressions and the one that hits the hardest for most families. I know it can be a really intimidating time for parents - especially new ones who aren’t exactly sure what to expect when it comes to this regression, but I am here to help you through it and prepare you as much as possible for what to expect and how to deal with it.
So what exactly is the four month sleep regression?
It's really a ‘PROgression’ if you think about it, since a lot of growth is taking place and they are advancing out of the newborn stage and growing at lightening speed. Have I piqued your interest yet? keep reading to find out what they more about the four month sleep regression.
The regression is made up of these things:
developmental milestones and learned skills
changing sleep cycles
mobility
awareness & alertness
sleep dependencies/sleep associations
associating sounds with people and activities that can trigger an awake mode
growing appetite
There are three major components that make up the FMSR (four month sleep regression):
DEVELOPMENTAL GROWTH:
The four month sleep regression is a phase where your baby is going through a lot of growth developmentally and physically. Their brain is undergoing major developmental changes, where their sleep cycles are maturing and becoming more adult-like. Their bodies now have a more consistent output of melatonin and they’re now able to have more solid, structured and restorative sleep, but inevitably as you know, with all these changes can also come lots of unwanted sleep disturbances.
Why would that cause a sleep regression?
Let me elaborate…newborns have two stages of sleep active and quiet. by the 3-5 months old their quiet sleep is split into 3 phases making the sleep cycle go from 2 stages to 4, and while that sleep cycle may be longer than a newborn sleep cycle, babies often wake more in this sleep cycle because there are now more transitions that are taking place, and after each transition, they have a partial wakening, where they may make up and have a hard time going back to sleep if they can’t do this on their own to begin with. So the 3 stages of non rem (nREM) sleep are light sleep where your infant drifts off initially, stage 2 is deeper sleep stage 3 is the deepest sleep and then they have REM sleep. So while transitioning from one stage of sleep to the next, they often wake up and this can happen every 1-2 hours throughout the night.
MOBILITY:
At around 3-5 months of age, you’ll notice how much more mobile and active your baby has become, and it seems like this can happen overnight, right under your nose. They’re discovering their ability to roll, scoot, and many babies have even started rolling from belly to back at this age (some can go from back to belly but that takes more time to coordinate). This is one reason why it’s recommended to remove the swaddle at around 12 weeks of age, because naturally they are beginning to move around a lot more and we don’t want to restrict that movement - we want to encourage it - and trust me, they want it, too! This newfound mobility can also disrupt their sleep, especially when they start practicing their new acrobatic skills in the crib and get stuck in positions they’re not fond of.
AWARENESS:
The third major component that makes up the FMSR is your baby’s awareness. They wake up one day and all of a sudden they are aware of everything around them. They are aware of their surroundings, whose putting them to sleep and where they are put to sleep, and they are starting to recognize people and faces, too. This is obviously a major sign of growth for our babies, but this awareness is often accompanied by a lot of fragmented sleep. So what may have seemed like a dream in being able to rock, or nurse or shush/pat your baby to sleep as a newborn, will now likely seem like a nightmare as they start taking longer and longer to settle and fall asleep. So whatever your baby relied on up until now in order to fall asleep is not going to have the same effect as it did before they reached this stage which is a pretty good indication that it’s time to teach your baby good independent sleep skills!
When can I expect this regression to hit?
The regression can happen anywhere from 3-5 months old, as this is the time that those developmental changes that we spoke about earlier are happening, and it can typically last anywhere from 2-4 weeks (or more depending on how severe the regression is and how you deal with it).
But before you freak out, let me ease your mind and tell you that no, not all babies experience this regression. In fact, I find that if your baby already has good independent sleep skills before they hit this stage, the regression passes over with zero to minimal affect. And if your baby does have good independent sleep skills and experiences some setbacks, I find that they’re much easier to fix and navigate through with minimal work at best. The opposite is true for babies who don’t have independent sleep skills by this time, and usually feel the regression the most having a have a major impact on their sleep.
SIgns that your baby is going through the regression:
Your baby may have been sleeping nicely before, or not, but nonetheless their sleep is now erratic with no rhyme or reason. They’re suddenly waking more often at night, cat napping throughout the day and they're increasingly fussy and difficult to put to sleep and have a hard time staying asleep.
The list below are the most common signs of the FMSR and will help you identify whether or not your baby is going through it:
Interrupted/fragmented sleep
A lot of middle of the night wakings
Baby is taking cat/micro naps
Baby may seem increasingly hungry throughout the day or night
They become harder to soothe and put to sleep
Do any of these sound familiar? If so, don’t worry, these are all normal ‘symptoms’ of the FMSR.
Will the regression pass if I wait it out?
I always like to come from a place of positivity and encouragement, but I have bad news for you on this one…simply put, no, the regression will not fix itself. I mean of course it’s possible for a baby to overcome his/her sleep issues on their own, and if that’s your baby, then lucky you! But in reality, if you were to sit back and wait for the regression to pass or fix itself, you’d likely be waiting quite a while and it could potentially take months or even years to sort out. You may be wondering BUT WHY and I will tell you right now. The reason is because by this age, babies’ sleep habits are so hard-wired that they’re engrained in their brain. Their sleep associations and their dependency on something or someone putting them to sleep and back to sleep when they wake are so strong that they don’t have the skills or the ability to fall asleep unassisted - they literally don’t know how and it’s usually a matter of needing to teach them.
How to get through the sleep regression?
This is the perfect time to teach your baby independent sleep skills, and most importantly, create positive sleep associations! This is a big one, guys, it will be your biggest key to success in getting through the FMSR! You want them to be able to rely on their own sleep skills in order to fall asleep. That doesn’t mean they can’t have a pacifier or a lovie or even be fed to sleep from time to time if that’s what you enjoy doing, but make sure that within that, your baby ALSO has the ability to fall asleep on his/her own.
Here are 5 essential components to getting through the FMSR:
Set time aside for your baby to learn his/her new skills.
Once you commit to devoting the time to teach your little one independent sleep skills, stick to it. Give yourself 1-2 weeks to implement any sleep training method and for them to learn their new skill. He/she will get there, but they need your devotion and your gentle encouragement.Be patient and stay consistent.
As always, consistency is key with any changes you are trying to make and with whichever sleep training method you are trying are implementing. You want to be mindful that you are sending a clear message to your little one with what you are doing, to make the adjustment period and learning process as smooth as possible for you and your baby. And of course, patience is also crucial here as well as this can take anywhere from a few days to a few weeks for a full turnaround depending on how consistent you are and of course which route you choose to go when teaching your little one how to sleep.Have a solid plan of action.
Having a clear and concrete plan is crucial for implementing any sleep training method. It’s tremendously helpful to have what to refer to if you get stuck or hit a bump in the road, as this is common during sleep training. Understanding what you’re doing to help your little one and why and making sure you have the right knowledge will also help you get stay on track and reach your goal.Focus on full feedings.
We all know how important it is to make sure babies are getting full feedings during the day and meeting their daily calorie requirements. I can’t tell you how overlooked this one gets and I honestly don’t really understand why. A hungry baby is going to be a very cranky baby who also won’t be easily soothed or sleep well. At 3-5 months of age, babies tend to get very distracted during their feedings which can cause them to easily miss a feeding or simply not take in enough calories. This can quickly result in a cycle of micro or insufficient feedings or your baby waking up frequently at night to cash in on all the missed calories he should have had during the day.
But how do I make sure my baby gets full feedings?
A. Make sure your baby isn’t oversleeping during the day, as not to miss out on a daytime feeding. Wake them up if you have to in order to get that feeding in.
B. If you have a very distractible baby, try feeding him/her in a dark room with little stimulation so ensure he is eating well.C. Avoid feeding your baby when he/she is overtired because tired babies don’t eat well. Better to feed a bit earlier than too late when your baby is just too tired to eat.
Create positive sleep associations.
Start encouraging independent sleep! This is the best time to start implementing good sleep habits and giving your little one a box full of tools to help him learn how to fall asleep unassisted. These skills will last him a lifetime and you will be happy you nipped the four month sleep regression inn the bud - trust me on this one!So for all of the parents out there with four month old babies, you will get through this!! Follow these steps and you will have a much more manageable time going through this regression.
You got this, mama!