Split nights
What are split nights?
A split night is when your baby wakes in the middle of the night having difficulty falling back asleep and remaining awake for a long period of time - sometimes even for hours. Upon waking, they are generally happy and ready to play. A true split night is when your baby suddenly has a new pattern of waking at night for a few consecutive nights in a row or multiple times a week.
Simply put, split nights are typically due to unbalanced daytime sleep. Your baby is likely exceeding their daytime sleep, which can literally eat up their nighttime sleep. This oversleeping decreases much needed sleep pressure from building and can also disrupt their circadian rhythm, resulting in a baby waking up at ungodly hours of the night, rested, happy and ready to play.
Split nights can also be caused by a too early bedtime, so be mindful of your baby’s bedtime and see if they possibly need a little bit of a later one. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for early bedtimes in my house, but if a child is going to bed way too early for their age, then it will likely cause some sort of sleep disturbance, like an early morning waking or a split night.
Here’s an example:
Let’s say a twelve month old baby requires about 11-14 hours of total sleep in a 24 hour period. If this baby is taking a very long nap during the day (say 3-4 hours) and perhaps also sleeping in really late in the morning and the recommended amount of daytime sleep for this age is 2-2.5 hours, then they are oversleeping and over exceeding their required daytime sleep. This means that come bedtime, they’ll either have difficulty falling asleep, or they will fall asleep at their usual bedtime but wake up in the middle of the night having met all of their sleep requirements for the day.
Let’s do a little math to further break down this scenario: 12 month old requires 11-14 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period. He naps for 3.5 hours and goes to bed at 7:00 pm which is his usual bedtime. 2:00 am he wakes up and is wide awake and rested. He napped for 3.5 hours and slept for another 7 hours from 7 pm - 2 am. By 2:00 am, baby has already gotten 10.5 hours of sleep in a 24 hour period - that’s almost the recommended amount of sleep for his age and some babies at this age can’t even sleep more than 10 hours in a 24 hour period.
So I hope I have clarified what it means to meet and exceed the recommended amount of sleep for their age. If you’re lucky, this baby may sleep through then night and skip the split night altogether, but he will most definitely wake up at 4-5 am rested and ready to start the day.
Ok, so your child is waking at night consistently and is up for a very long time at night having a hard time falling back asleep…now what? How do I fix it?
Here are some ways to help prevent split nights.
limit daytime sleep.
Yes, I know, not always the preferable option especially when nap time often equals much needed mommy time. But the truth is, if your baby oversleeps, you are also causing them to exceed their daytime sleep which starts to eat away at their night time sleep (it has to take away from somewhere). So be mindful of how much sleep your baby is getting and find out what’s appropriate amount of daytime sleep for their age. Yes, there are times and situations where your baby will require more sleep like during a growth spurt or an illness, but generally speaking they should not call a certain amount of daytime sleep if you want them to also sleep well at night.
Follow age appropriate wake windows for your baby’s age.
to make sure you are allowing enough sleep pressure to build. Without this sleep pressure your baby will not nap well or sleep well at night. You want them to go to bed with enough sleep pressure to carry them through the night and not be too low that it will cause your baby to wake at 2 or 3 am ready to party.
Work on setting a consistent wake time for your child.
You may not love this one, but here goes…
Wake your child up in the morning at their usual wake time (or a reasonable time). Really refrain from letting them sleep in even if they were up for a long time at night. Yes, they’ll likely be tired and even a bit grouchy, and yes it may seem cruel, like why would I not let my tired child catch up on sleep? But here’s the thing…letting them sleep in is only going to perpetuate this split night saga and throw them off schedule even more. Waking them in the morning is the best way to reset or reboot their body clock and get them back on track onto a good predictable schedule. Their circadian rhythm will thank you!
Waking your child at the same time every day will help reinforce a set wake time which will also help those wake windows become more predictable and reliable. Doing this will also help your child build proper sleep pressure that he/she needs in order to sleep well during the day for naps and at night. It will also help regulate their circadian rhythm which will ultimately be what helps them sleep better throughout the night.
Push bedtime a drop later
If your little one has an exceptionally early bedtime, it might be a good idea to start pushing that bedtime up a little bit, especially if it will help build more sleep pressure and give them more time to blow off steam. A very early bedtime (6 pm for example) is really only recommended if they need to go to sleep early, like if they missed a nap or had a very short nap. But don’t just put them to bed too early just because you feel like it especially if they aren’t truly ready for sleep because this can result in a split night situation.
What is the difference between split nights and all other types of night wakings?
There is a really simple explanation for this, actually. With Split nights, your child doesn't wake out of habit or hunger, nor do they require anything from you, and are generally happy and playful upon waking. They have simply met all of their sleep requirements for the day/night and are awake feeling rested.
With other night wakings, your child usually wakes out of habit or hunger. They typically aren't happy upon waking and require your assistance in going back to sleep. They have not yet met their sleep requirements for the day/night so typically they cry because they are still tired and not happy to be awake.
I hope you found this helpful and I hope I have given you enough tools to tackle split nights head on if and when they appear in your household.